One year ago today…

One year ago today I was minutes from going to ron’s work to pick him up. We were off to lunch and then my OB appt. I had slept in as long as I could, I had been up in the middle of the night having contractions. Nothing big but regularily for an hour or two. I had been online with two other june mommies who were also having contractions, which was kinda cool. We were all kinda excited about it, our babies were coming soon! I didn’t think much of it, I figured I had a long way to go, at least the end of june but it was nice that my body was starting to practice. I started charging our camera batteries, just to be ready for things to come. Contractions slowed down and I crawled back into bed with Ron.

So I drove on up and picked up ron at work. We went to famous dave’s for lunch, I had no idea it would be the last food I’d eat for days. I had a burger and fries I think. Ron was looking at me disapprovingly as I was not supposed to have too much salt (damn swelling!). We joked that maybe my numbers would be so bad that they would just send me to the hospital, but we didn’t really mean it. (I had also put my camera and batteries into the trunk of the car, just in case!) We had extra time afterwards so we went to target to pick up some stuff for when evie was born as I was on bedrest and didn’t want to send ron out alone to pick up granny panties and pads for me. While at target I took my blood pressure. It was high, really high. I felt terribly, I had been trying to be relaxed while we were out but I did need these things, like I could go out once evie was born or on the way home from the hospital… I hated feeling like a walking time bomb, you can’t really FEEL high blood pressure so it was hard just sit on the couch doing nothing... We were then off to the OB office. We went to the location that was across from the hospital, not the one downtown as we didn’t want to pay for parking.

Got to the office, don’t remember too much other than once we went back and they took my blood pressure they immediately told me to lie down on my side. Then they came in with a 24 hour urine jug, I had done this twice already so it was no surprise but so not fun to go all the way downstairs to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. Since it was Friday they asked that we returned it the next morning to the hospital lab so they could get my numbers right away. Ron and I thought this was pretty lame but… (and do that on bedrest how???).

But then dr. l came in, she was my favorite OB in the whole practice, the one that had been on call when I had my appendectomy and we really liked her a lot. She kinda kicked the bag with the 24 hour urine jug and said, ‘you won’t be needing this anymore! you guys are going straight to the hospital to be induced.’ Ron and I looked at each other, I was nervous but also happy that my worries would be over. I hated sitting at home feeling like a time bomb about to go off, not knowing how fast my pre-e would develop, when it would become TOO dangerous to evie and i. Dr. Levitan was a little surprised. She said, ‘so… this is normally when I get tears from people!’. Ron and I said, ‘we half expected you to say something like this, the camera is in the car…’ We asked and she said that dr. k was on call all weekend (it was Friday, about 1:00 in the afternoon). I was very happy about this news, if it wasn’t dr. l delivering evie, then I wanted it to be dr. k. She had been the one who put me on bedrest and she was very matter of fact and serious about this pre-e/high blood pressure thing and I liked that, I felt very secure in knowing that I’d be in her care. They told us to go straight to station 24 in the OB unit (I think that’s the station I can’t remember).

We headed over to the hospital, the whole block over, and called my mom and ron’s parents on the way over. (oh, and ron’s work since they were expecting him back!) Grabbed the camera and some of the stuff from Target (pretty good timing on THAT trip!).

Checked in, got a room and got me gowned up.



Started an iv and kicked in the mag sulfate. Wow is that stuff horrible! Burned going on and made me feel terrible. Started inducing me with cervical ripeners and I started having contractions. Unfortunately, after a few hours the mag killed the contractions and I started feeling horrible. I had pain on my right side, I thought it was heart burn but now I know it was my liver and the beginnings of HELLP. My sister and my mom were so excited and came up right away (I like how they didn’t even ask if they could come…). Ron left to go home to pick up a list of things (I didn’t even have a bag packed yet, I still had a month to go!). While he was gone I did not feel well. My mom and my sister were kinda annoying me, they weren’t doing anything in particular, just being excited and talking (imagine that!). Ron and I had been sitting quietly (well I was on the bed), but the difference in the room dynamic bothered me. They were chatting and excited and making noise whereas I liked the calm that we had before. At one point I had turned off all the lights in the room short of one light and it was still too much for me. I put the pillow over my head to block out the noise and light. Ron finally came back and I took some tums (with doctor's approval) and hoped to feel better. Finally they said that nothing was happening that night, my mom and sister left at 11 or midnight (promising to be back at 7, I told them to take their time, i knew nothing would be happening by then...) and after they popped in a different cervical ripener and we tried to settle in. I was in so much upper gastric pain, finally around 2 a nurse mentioned that dr. k left orders for morphine if I wanted some (don’t ask why I didn’t ask for pain meds, like I said I was not myself, I look back and think, duh!…), HELL YES I wanted some! I had planned on a natural birth trying for no drugs (I laugh when I think of how drugged up I ended up being…) but this was already much different than I had planned… With the morphine I was able to sleep, finally fell asleep and slept through til 7. my mom and sister came back and I shot them a look of death, they left to get breakfast and I tried to fall back asleep. not for long though, my breakfast was brought in, yea! I was STARVING! I started eating and felt sick. Then I puked and puked. Meh. Dr. k came in and said it’s common from the mag, no more food for me. Grrr…



Waited around in pain, was to be checked at noon to see my ‘progress’. At 11 am I got a shot in my iv for nausea as I still felt sick. Around noon dr. k came in, checked my progress and said… ‘labs are going downhill, liver is not well, platelets are way down, you don’t feel well and you aren’t progressing at all, it’s time to get this baby out. I don’t want you to be mad at your baby for making you feel this way. We want to do an emergency c-section, ron here are some scrubs, I’ll have a nurse come prep you, I have a baby to deliver and we’ll meet in the OR’. I must have looked confused, baby to deliver? But I thought you said emergency? She smiled and said, ‘no worries, it’s this woman’s fifth child and she spits them out like watermelon seeds, I’ll be out in a few minutes. Don’t tell her I said that!’ ha! :)

I was fine with a c-section, at that point I couldn’t do anything other than lie on my left side, my BP shot up if I moved so I had no idea how they expected me to push a baby out. And I felt so poorly, I didn’t think I COULD push out a baby…

They wheeled me away into the OR, dr. k met me in there and she hugged me and asked questions/distracted me while they put in my spinal (she was asking about DH’s name, how it’s rare to see a young guy named ron, etc). got me numbed up, brought in ron, put up the curtain and started things. Ron was trying to distract me, asking what we wanted to name her (no, we hadn’t chosen yet!) and I agreed to Evangeline (his choice). I didn’t even really care at that point, I was waiting to hear our baby cry and would have agreed to anything to shut him up. They had to push on my upper abdomen to get her down, she was so high. Finally she was out! She cried and dr. k held her up so we could see her.

They brought her over to the side to check her out. 5 pounds 10 ounces! Healthy, no worries. Called ron over and had him bring her over to me. (which freaked him out to no end. #1, he didn’t want to see any of the surgery/me cut open and #2 hold this tiny baby AND walk with it!?!? :) ) she was adorable. I was afraid to touch her, I don’t think my arms were tied down but I was afraid to move them. After a few minutes they had ron bring her to the nursery (holding/walking with her the whole way!), he took pics while they cleaned her up.







I was just hanging out being sewn up. It was funny, I didn’t want to close my eyes, I was tired but I was afraid that they would freak out if I shut my eyes and relaxed. Dr. k said that my appendectomy healed wonderfully and that my uterus and everything looked healthy and great. Finally they wheeled me out (after transferring me from the table to a bed, THAT was freaky!).

I was in recovery for just a little bit when my mom and sister came in, and ron rolled evie in!



He passed her off to me, I was shaking from the spinal. She was so cute and all wrapped up like a little burrito.





I wanted to see her body/hands/feet, etc but just didn’t have it in me. I asked ron, she’s fine, hands/feet/fingers/toes? He said yes so I believed him. I wanted to start breastfeeding but they said nope, not until I can sit up and I couldn’t sit up until I could feel/move my feet. That was depressing. I finally let my mom hold her (I had made a rule that only ron could hold her until I got to hold her, I wanted to be number 2, I didn’t want to be the last one to hold her!).





Then my sister got to hold her once she pried her away from my mom. Evie was so adorable.



Evie was fine, developed a little jaundice but was fine overall. I on the other hand, was not. I had a terrible night the night after she was born, got no sleep (was drugged to the point that when I fell asleep I’d stop breathing and set off my oxygen monitor…so then I’d wake up, breathe deeply for a few breaths, fall asleep, stop breathing, set off alarm, wake up, breathe deeply, repeat throughout the ENTIRE night. I finally started crying, I was so exhausted and then a nurse came in and told me she had to weigh me for transport!?! She said she’d send someone in and she didn’t! finally a nurse came in and brought in my doctor and my doctor said ‘no more percocet until she asks for it!’ the mag sulfate and what they gave me in the c-section was enough to kill my pain, I didn’t need 2 percocet every 4 hours as well! (after my appendectomy I would take ONE percocet and it would TOTALLY wipe me out and they were giving me two!) And then, THEN giving me evie to feed! I can’t believe I didn’t drop her. I also can’t believe I let them do that but I was so not with it…).



My BP was still super high, it sucked. I had vision issues, spots in my eyes, couldn’t handle sunlight, couldn’t read my computer… they finally let me out on Wednesday after 5 nights in the hospital. I was still afraid to do anything, I’d go for a walk in the hospital and they would come take my BP and tell me that I wasn’t allowed out of bed or off my left side for a few hours, only to go the bathroom. It was so frustrating. For weeks afterwards (it didn’t go down until about 6 weeks later) I was afraid to go on walks or do anything with Evie… she was worth it of course!

And that was one year ago today…



and this was mother's day this year. :)